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Motivating Yourself When You Want to Give Up

Not many people think of Arnold Schwarzenegger when they think of inspiring people.

Usually, his name brings up associations with big name movies like Conan the Barbarian, The Terminator, or Predator. Before that, he was one of the greatest bodybuilders in his time (he’s still considered the greatest of all time by many today). More recently, he was the Governor of California.

Although Arnold Schwarzenegger has had a seemingly eclectic life, what all of these ventures had in common was that they all required hard work, discipline, determination, and grit in order to achieve.

They also all had a huge margin for failure.

Think about how many people want to hold a high position in government. How many people want to become famous actors. How many people want to achieve even just a good looking physique. In all of these ventures, the majority of people who want it end up failing, and never make it. Arnold has done it all.

That’s not to say that he has never failed before, or come across roadblocks. He pretty much started at the bottom, with all of us. In fact, he probably had it a lot worse, growing up in a small village in Austria.

As a young adult, he was inspired one day to become a bodybuilder. Unfortunately, his father had other plans for him, and arranged to have him put in the Austrian military.

Despite his situation, he still found ways to train.

When an opportunity came by for him to compete in a major bodybuilding contest, he intended on taking it. But when he asked his superiors if he could take a day off to compete in the bodybuilding contest, they refused, saying that it was a waste of time.

Risking the consequences of being put in solitary confinement, he decided to sneak out, and after hopping trains cross-country to get there, competed in the bodybuilding contest.

Even though he was a complete outsider at the time, he ended up winning the contest.

That marked a turning point in his life, where he knew that if he truly had the determination, grit, and discipline to do something, then he can achieve any goal he set his mind to. It was a mindset that he carried with him throughout his entire life.

In a commencement speech that he gave a in 2009, he gave us six rules of success that he has followed in his own life, that I turn to whenever I feel like giving up:

  1. Trust yourself: What do you truly want to do? Not what your parents or teachers think you should do, but you you yourself want. Trust that you are the only one in the world that can decide for yourself, and go with your decision.

  2. Break some rules: Don’t break any laws, but realize that those who follow all the rules are never truly original, or never end up making any significant impact on the world.

  3. Don’t be afraid of failure: You can’t always win, but that should not stop you from taking risks and making important decisions. Accept the fact that failure may happen, and work to succeed.

  4. Ignore the naysayers: There will always be people telling you that it can’t be done. It’s up to you decide whether or not they are worth listening to (they’re not).

  5. Work like hell: Nothing is free, and you should not expect things to be given to you without working hard for it. Even that is not enough; you have to work harder than everyone else is.

  6. Give something back: This one is one of the most important rules. You have to find time to give back, and realize that the world is not only about you, but also the millions of people around you who have not only helped support you, but require help themselves.

So when I feel like I am about to give up, I think about how this is all normal. It’s normal for it to be hard. Of course you’re going to have people that say you can’t do it. Of course you have to work hard for what you want. Of course you’re going to fail at something eventually, but you did it anyways. You left your comfort zone when everyone else stayed behind.

Here is one quote from his speech that really resonates with me every time I read it:

I always say don’t be afraid of failure, because how far can you really fall? You found out - to the ground. It’s right there. Now you know it isn’t anything that should scare you. You should be proud that you weren’t afraid - not embarrassed that you failed. You could have made excuses not to do it, but you didn’t. You knew it would be hard, and it would be uncomfortable, and it might be awkward - and you did it anyway. That’s courage.

You just have to trust yourself to get back up again, and try again, over and over again until you succeed.

If we all stopped trying every time we fell over when we were first learning to walk, no one would be walking.

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Originally published on Quora